Time certainly does travel fast. It seems like it was just yesterday when the twins were born. Now, as of Tuesday, August 26th, they are four weeks old. ONE MONTH!! I can't believe it. At this rate, I'll be eighty years old, retired, and broke tomorrow. I thought time only traveled this fast when you were either riding a roller coaster after waiting in line for 2 hours, or when you "made-out" with a girl for the first time. All of them are fun, a little stressful, and a complete blur afterwards.
This past month has been challenging emotionally, physically, and logistically. It's been an emotional tsunami filled with wonderful peaks and crushing valleys. And I thought high school was an emotional time. Managing your "reputation", avoiding bullies, and puberty doesn't compare to the emotional toll that it takes on you when you have babies in intensive care for more than a month. One day we experience holding our children for the first time, and then the next we are awaiting test results for blood diseases....or infections....or brain function...or central nervous system activity...or blindness....or a number of other potentially deadly ailments. All the while knowing that 1.) they're at an increased risk for most of these things since they were born 2 months premature and 2.) if they test positive for any of these, the effects can be long-lasting, life-altering, and even disabling or deadly. So when the twins were diagnosed with MRSA, it was certainly a time spent in one of those "crushing valleys". Seeing them put in isolation, nurses having to dress in gowns and gloves when even entering their room, and witnessing their tiny bodies stave off infection was difficult. And unfortunately, the oft-offered advice of "stay positive" is easier said than done.
But the adage, "the lower the lows, the higher the highs" has rang true, more so than ever, in the past month. Because when I cradle my three pound baby in my arms as she awakes and looks me dead in the eye, smiles and reaches up and touches my face, it's pure euphoria. At that moment, it's simply her and I; creating a bond and a love that will literally last a lifetime. Or every time that I place my finger in the palm of their hand and they instantly grasp it and squeeze as tight as their little arm muscles will allow always brings a smile to my face and a sense of nirvana to my soul.
So when you ask me how I'm doing and how are the girls doing, and I nonchalantly say, "we're doing well" and leave it at that, it's because I don't have the time nor the energy to describe what has happened that day or the last couple of days. Don't be offended, but I've lived through it once, and I usually can't handle the recap for everyone that I talk to. Hopefully this gives you an idea of our emotions and a better answer to the question: "So, how are Taylor and Madison doing today?"
And even though I'm a firm believer in the proverb, 'what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger', this is ridiculous. I was misled last November when I was told that 3o was the new 20. I don't ever remember 20 being like this!
But as a guy, I get a pass on the physical tolls that Emily has endured over the past month. I won't get into specifics (she doesn't like me talking about her on this blog - but don't tell her I said that), but the obvious pains and complications that come with recovering from an 8 inch slit cut through your abdomen should be fairly easy to imagine. Then there is the breastfeeding/pumping. Wow, I had no idea the time, discomfort, and difficulty in the process. The twins eat every 3 hours, which means mom has to produce enough milk for TWO babies that eat every THREE HOURS. That's a lot of pumping. And once you decide to breastfeed, and mom starts pumping, apparently you have to do it regularly or her boobs get large and uncomfortable (like a water balloon left on the spigot too long). Ok, sorry Emily, that's all I'll say.
Emily has handled it all very well. I don't know how she does it. She spends all day at the hospital, changing diapers, taking temperatures, and providing anything and everything for our kids. She's the rock!
Logistically, we are retarded. For some reason, we decided to move shortly after our kids were born. Building a house, and consequently selling a house, requires time and analysis. And since the kids have recently began nursing every 3 hours, Emily has to be at the hospital all day. Therefore, most household tasks, research, shopping, and general chores fall on me. Thus, needless to say, our house is a mess, we have no food or clothes, our new house has only 3 walls (my new innovative design), and the grass in the lawn is 3 ft. long. BUT, my sand volleyball team is really, REALLY good!
Ok, so maybe it's not quite that bad, but it is tough. Emily's had to be at the hospital constantly during the last week or so. We do our best to get most of the household chores done at night (usually from 10pm to midnight) after we come home from the hospital. Otherwise our weekends are pretty valuable because it provides me some time to get things done around the house. We've got a lot going on right now - Houses, babies, KAFFL, volleyball, daycare, family events, work, chores, Indy, and THIS BLOG. And that's just on Tuesday! Hmmm, which one can I get rid of? (stupid blog!)
But in all honesty, I think we do a pretty good job with juggling everything. I'm pretty much a personal planning genius that focuses on the minutia, and Emily handles the "big picture" stuff that I seem to skip over. We make a pretty good team, just don't try waking us up before 8am or we will kill you . . . seriously!
I guess time really does fly when you're having fun. . . . or something like that. Either that, or I've found a rip in the space/time continuum that has allowed me to advance a month in Earthly time but it's actually taken me only a day to do it. OR, having twins in the ICU for 1 month+ is a time vehicle of sorts that allows you to move through time seamlessly. That must be it!
So Marty McFly, you're not the only one who can travel through time. . . . with your Dalorian and flux capaciter. . . you think you're so special. Well, I have two kids in ICU and I seem to be able to travel through time just as well. And I don't have to befriend an old, crazy man to do it!
Log of major events since our last posting:
Tuesday, August 12th - Taylor & Madison had their nasal cannulas (nose tubes) removed! They are no longer on any respiratory aides of any kind. The feeling was fantastic as their improvement becomes visible when tubes or wires are removed from their isolates. They are still receiving antibiotics for MRSA, but their energy level and activity level seems to be rising . . . which is a good sign. They received new isolettes (incubators) today as well. They change them out every couple of weeks for sanitary purposes, I guess. These new isolettes are a bit older and less technological. I guess that's good because they probably feel as though the twins don't need the level of monitoring that the newer isolettes provide.
Weight: Taylor: 2 lbs. 13.1 oz Madison: 3 lbs. 2.7 oz
- Wednesday, August 13th - Madison had a picc line (peripherally inserted central catheter - form of intravenous access that can be used for a prolonged period of time) inserted into her right leg to administer her antibiotics to combat MRSA.
Weight: Taylor: 2 lbs. 14.3 oz Madison: 3 lbs. 3.6 oz
- Thursday, August 14th - The twins began to receive iron and vitamins for nutritional purposes. Taylor stopped receiving antibiotics for MRSA 1 day early as she didn't have the infection in her blood.
Weight: Taylor: 2 lbs. 14.5 oz Madison: 3 lbs. 4.8 oz
- Saturday, August 16th - The twins had the footprints taken for the first time ever. We will use them to put into shadowboxes that we received from Emily's cousin at a baby shower. The footprints were only a couple inches long!
Weight: Taylor: 2 lbs. 15.7 oz Madison: 3 lbs. 7.5 oz
- Monday, August 18th - The twins moved UP to preemie diapers (Pampers Swaddlers). They had been in diapers smaller than preemies (they looked like doll diapers).
Weight: Taylor: 3 lbs. 1.9 oz Madison: 3 lbs. 8.3 oz
- Wednesday, August 20th - Both twins were removed from their oral antibiotic which was administered through their feeding tube. They were given their first sponge baths by their Mom today! This involved just wiping them off with warm water. They weren't actually submerged in a bath.
Weight: Taylor: 3 lbs. 3.4 oz Madison: 3 lbs. 10.4 oz
- Thursday, August 21st - Emily started to nurse the twins. The girls took to it very well - which is a good sign that they'll take to bottles easily.
Weight: Taylor: 3 lbs. 4.6 oz Madison: 3 lbs. 12.4 oz
- Saturday, August 23rd - The girls feeding tubes were switched from their mouth to their noses. The girls have become strong enough to pull them out of their mouths more often, so they were inserted into their noses. This allows for easier breast & bottle feeding.
Weight: Taylor: 3 lbs. 5.8 oz Madison: 3 lbs. 13.2 oz
- Sunday, August 24th - Taylor received her first "real" bath. Mom & I gave her a bath outside of her isolette. She was in a "bathtub" and cleaned from top to bottom! She seemed to enjoy the bath, which tells me that she'll be a swimmer like her mom. The girls were also taken off caffeine, which helped them to maintain energy to feed. Madison's picc line clotted, so it was removed from her leg and an IV was placed in her hand. The nurses took foot prints of the kids and put them on signs in their rooms. Cute!
Weight: Taylor: 3 lbs. 6.8 oz Madison: 3 lbs. 13.6 oz
- Monday, August 25th - The girls received an eye exam for ROP (retinopathy of prematurity - abnormal blood vessels grow and spread throughout the retina). Both passed with flying colors. Although the test itself was difficult to watch. They clamped open their eyes and kinda poked their eyeballs with a metal prod. They didn't like it too much as they screamed and cried. Luckily, it didn't last more than 60 seconds, and they were back to sleep in no time.
Weight: Taylor: 3 lbs. 8.0 oz Madison: 3 lbs. 14.9 oz
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
2 Weeks Old!!
Taylor
Taylor
Madison
Madison
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Taylor
Taylor
Madison
Madison
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Taylor
Taylor
Madison
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Taylor
Taylor
Taylor
Madison
Madison
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
3 Weeks Old!!
Taylor
Taylor
Taylor
Taylor
Taylor
Taylor
Taylor
Taylor
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Taylor
Taylor
Taylor
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Madison
Friday, August 22, 2008
Madison
Madison
Madison
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Taylor's Footprints
Madison's Footprints
Dad getting ready to give Taylor her first full bath!
Taylor's First Bath
Taylor's First Bath
Taylor's First Bath
Taylor's First Bath
Taylor's First Bath
Madison
Monday, August 25, 2008
Madison
Madison - No pick line or IV in her legs!
The Girls' Current Weights